Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key"
to "Press Enter Key" because of the flood of calls asking
where the Any Key is.
AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was
hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be
the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes.
A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies
of the floppies.
Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer
to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician
discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it
in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged
because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid."
The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and
"invalid" responses shouldn't be taken personally.
A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents.
He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't
find printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen
to face the printer but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer."
An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get
her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was
plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed
the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this
foot pedal and nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned
out to be the mouse.
Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand-new
computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it
in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When
asked what happened when she pressed the power switch, she asked "What
Another IBM customer had troubles installing software and rang for
support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to
put in the second disk, and I had some problems with the disk. When
it said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in...."
The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" meant to remove
Disk 1 first.
In a similar incident, a customer had followed the instructions for
installing software. The instructions said to remove the disk from
its cover and insert into the drive. The user had physically removed
the casing of the disk and wondered why there were problems.
True story from a Novell NetWare Sysop:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my
warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because
I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show?
How did you get this cup holder?
Caller: It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotion.
It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he couldn't
stand it. He was laughing too hard. The caller had been using the
load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off
A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asked her if she was running it under Windows." The
woman responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is
a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a
window and his printer is working fine."
Tech Support: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape
keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of
the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"