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Computer Programming Quotes

There are only two industries that refer to their customers as "users".
-Edward Tufte

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
-Pablo Picasso

Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work. Practice is when something works, but you don't know why. Programmers combine theory and practice: Nothing works and they don't know why.

I really hate this damned machine
I wish that they would sell it.
It never does quite what I want
But only what I tell it.

A Programmer's Lament
For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.
-H L Mencken

And the users exclaimed with a laugh and a taunt: It's just what we asked for but not what we want.

Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them.
-Laurence J. Peter

The Six Phases of a Project:

  • Enthusiasm

  • Disillusionment

  • Panic

  • Search for the Guilty

  • Punishment of the Innocent

  • Praise for non-participants